Conversations: Misunderstood

I don’t know Chris.

Sometimes I feel like expressing myself is hard and full of effort? And eventually, I’m not even getting understood?

Why is communication so hard for me?

Signed,

Misunderstood

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Believe it or not, misunderstood, I’ve been here.

I recall the early days of my career, trying to explain something to a manager and all he kept saying was, “net it out!” Yeah, not a nice guy…but karma caught up with him.

Tired of hearing it, I took a step back and tried to figure out why I couldn’t communicate or express myself well so that I could be understood.

It came down to a few things I’d like to share with you, in case you can relate and/or benefit from my experience.

I was trying too hard

Since I was early in my career, fresh out of college, I was trying to impress. I thought by saying something, even if I had nothing of real substance, it was better than not saying anything at all.

So I’d get all up in my head and the words coming out of my mouth didn’t match what I was thinking. Ugh.

I wouldn’t think before I spoke

I didn’t think about the case I wanted to make or the story I wanted to tell before I spoke. I’d just launch in with anything that came to mind, thinking they could READ my mind.

Of course they couldn’t but I didn’t “think” about that. Double ugh.

I didn’t think I deserved to be heard

When people would look at me strangely after I spoke, in my head I’d say…hmmm I don’t think I was clear here and now they think I’M crazy.

So I’d just stop talking altogether, which wasn’t good because we only get better at communicating by…communicating. Final ugh.

So in short, misunderstood, what I had to learn to do was not to try so hard, think about what I wanted to say before saying it and know that I get better at being heard and understood if I kept at it.

Don’t give up on getting better at this…

Check in…see if any of my misfortunes and missteps are true for you and take heed.

You have no idea how many people would benefit from the gifts you have to offer, but they need to hear them.

You’re worth it and we’re waiting…

~ Let life love you!

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