Hi Chris,
How do you manage your emotions?
Signed,
Need emotional intelligence
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Hey need emotional intelligence, this is a great question.
If you do any scrolling on social media, (and this website by the way!) you’ll see many quotes to inspire you to “feel” a certain way. And the intent is good…positive…and in most cases, pure.
However, I would like to suggest that one does not…MANAGE their emotions.
Why?
Because what you “manage” closely and tightly has a way of getting loose, at the MOST inappropriate times.
I’m sure you’ve seen someone just “lose it” and wondered what the hell that was about. It’s likely because they’ve held their emotions in check (managed) for so long, that the dam burst.
Instead, may I suggest that you simply manage…your thoughts.
Here’s what I mean.
In the moment, (and I freaking KNOW that this is hard) ask yourself any one of the following questions:
- Do I really care about this or this person?
- What am I making this mean?
- What’s the gift in this?
When you can find your way to an “understanding” of your thoughts and their impact on your emotions, then you’ll effectively manage your emotions.
Using the questions to better “understand” your emotions, will allow you to create the BEST emotional state you want to be in.
The intelligence you seek, is really to understand your thoughts, not to manage your emotions. You do that by questioning what your perspective is on the emotion you’re feeling.
Now hear me…
There is no RIGHT OR WRONG of an emotion (as long as you can avoid hurting yourself or others).
We are ENTITLED to feel every emotion we’re given.
What we DO with it, is what really matters.
And once you “understand” your thoughts about it, you’ll know what to DO with it. Questioning it, will help your understanding of it.
It takes emotional intelligence to ask your question and even more to understand that this IS within your control.
You got this!
~ Find the gift!
If you have a question, challenge or issue that you’d like me to respond to for this blog, simply email me. I will respond to as many as I can and you will remain anonymous.