Hey Chris,
What are some tips on how to ease my insecurities, overthinking mind & emotions when each one is heightened in my relationship? These are issues I’ve had for years & been trying to fix for myself & my relationships but I’ve been failing.
Signed,
Failing in love
~~~~~~~~~~
Ah Failing in love, you are so not alone.
You may be experiencing these feelings in other areas of your life as well. Say, at work, when trying to make a decision or making a big purchase, etc.
Or it may just be in “relationships” — whether friendships or love-ships.
No matter…
I want you to first let go of the idea that you need to “fix yourself.” You are experiencing emotions we ALL go through in our journey on the planet.
And to “get past it” requires looking deeply at it, with all the honesty and love you can muster for you.
When we get into the headspace of insecurity, overthinking, etc. especially when it comes to relationships, it’s typically because we have lost the focus on our OWN well being.
Think of it this way.
When you are focused on something good for you like:
- planning a party for yourself or someone else
- planning a vacation or a fun day off
- planning to spend a weekend full of self-care
- reading a good book with a nice beverage
- watching a program you’ve been waiting for
- just hanging out with a good friend
Do you see how all of these things are focused on you?
This is important, because when you focus on yourself you can’t spend time in the insecurity, overthinking headspace. And even more important…
You discover how truly secure and comfortable you are in your relationship with…you.
This will make you happier, self-fulfilled and more attractive to both a friend and love-ship. Face it, no one wants to be with someone who “checks” them to make sure they want to be around you.
The way around it is to focus on you and you first, always. The other part of the relationship is a complement to your life. You know, just as salt, pepper and sugar are complements to great meals?
When you focus on you, “failing in love” you are “falling in love” with that special person in the relationship.
You.
And that’s the BEST tip I can give you.
Sending you lots of self-love!
~ Let life love you!
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Thank you.